The Friday Fizz
June 30, 2006



After a long and arduous workweek, it’s easy to forget what’s transpired in the sports world in recent days and what sporting events lie in wait on the weekend. So, the Friday Fizz is here to remind you that life is not all about TPS Reports and moody bosses. Life, for most men, is about sports, women and sex, and not necessarily in that order. So, without further ado, the following is my weekly riff of newsworthy notes that you and the boys can use as fodder for happy hour talk over a couple of pints at the local pub:

NBA Draft

The steal of the draft, no pun intended, has to be the Nets nabbing Marcus Williams from UConn with the 22nd pick. In an earlier edition of the Fizz, I predicted that Ronnie Brewer from Arkansas would be the last man standing in the famed Green Room on draft night. Instead, it was Williams with his laptop scandal and 14% body fat jiggling like warm jello at a summer barbeque. My bet is Williams checks in next season at 10% body fat and plays the back up role to Jason Kidd, perfectly. The second steal of the draft was the Nets taking Hassan Adams with the 54th pick. First, “Hot Sauce” Adams will make this team. Second, their up tempo, wide open offense will enable Adams to explode to the basket ala Richard Jefferson, as well as provide him enough wide open jumpers to take advantage of his marginal outside shooting. Third, drafted at 54, Adams’ salary will provide the Nets with the utmost bottom line value of any other pick in the draft.

On the flip side, one of the worst picks in the draft has to be Jordan Farmar going to the Lakers at 24. As a Pac-10 guy, I’ve witnessed my fair share of UCLA games both on TV and in person and believe me when I say that not once was I ever impressed by Farmar. I don’t know exactly what his end-of-season statistics were, but every game I saw seemed as if he had a turnover to assist ratio of 1:1. Not only that, I’ve never seen a point guard get outright stripped of the ball when entering an offense more often than Farmar. Sure, Farmar’s quick, explosive, and displayed a rather impressive 42-inch vertical leap at the Orlando camp, but turnovers in the NBA are met with disastrous results and Farmar is one lean, mean, turnover machine.

Nobody’s mentioning this but four college seniors were drafted in the top 11 picks. Furthermore, considering the fact that Adam Morrison basically played every minute of every game during his three years in college, a case can be made that five seniors were selected in the lottery. Sheldon Williams (5), Brandon Roy (6), Randy Foye (7) and JJ Reddick (11) proved that completing your degree and not jeopardizing NBA mega dollars is possible.

What’s the deal with the Supersonics? After they’re ridiculous 10th pick, I can see why so many only call them the Sonics nowadays. Sure, one can be wowed by a 7’8” wingspan but if that same person is not horrified at the fact that Fran Fraschilla watched this same kid barely execute a lay up two years ago in Senegal then something’s seriously, seriously, wrong. This all leads me to my biggest question about the NBA.

Why are teams so concerned with upside and potential and not just getting guys who can contribute consistently night in and night out? Think about it. There’s what, five or six superstars in the league today (D Wade, Kobe, King James, Nowitzke, Duncan, can’t think of another right now). With each team having around 12-14 guys, that means out of approximately 390 players, less than .01% are considered “super.” So, what in this math equation makes NBA execs think that they’re going to find the next great super athlete in the draft? This kid from Senegal goes 10th in the draft and might, I repeat, MIGHT, play in the NBA in two years. This makes no sense to me. Instead of searching for the next Jordan, snag an experienced player who’s proven himself against respectable competition who you know will give you 15 and 5 every night. If you draft enough of those players, overtime you’ll contend for a title and it won’t take a blockbuster, mortgage your entire future, kind of trade to do it.

The funniest side note of the NBA Draft came during Ronnie Brewer’s selection to Utah with the 15th pick. While Brewer and Stern were shaking hands, the crew at ESPN flashed a “most notable 15th picks in draft history” and the names they came up with were Steve Nash in 1996 and Matt Harpring in 1998. Matt Harpring? You mean to tell me Harpring is the second best 15th pick they could have listed. Unless his younger brother is the Director of Research at ESPN, or someone on the inside lost a bet to one of the Harpring’s, I can’t think of any reason why Matt’s name would have been mentioned here.

I know a trade is in the works for the Boston Celtics. Let’s just say I sincerely hope that Sebastian Telfair will be a part of it come July 1. His documentary is enough to make anyone sick. His 5’11” stature is very concerning. His arrest and release for carrying a concealed weapon on a team charter plane speaks to his intelligence and his play for the Trailblazers the past two seasons didn’t exactly warrant headlines. Fortunately, the Celts were able to dump Raef Lafrentz’s salary. If they can pick up Iverson without having to give up their other draft pick, Rajon Rondo, or having to part ways with Al Jefferson, they might actually have a fighting chance to be competitive in the East next season.

Tour de France

Did you know the race was starting tomorrow? I didn’t. Without Lance Armstrong in it, the Tour seems more like a jaunt than a tour. What’s really amazing though is that three of the top four contenders this year have been removed from the race. Five time runner up Jan Ullrich, Italian champ and last year’s second place finisher, Ivan Basso, and Spain’s Francisco Mancebo are all out on suspicion of their possible involvement with the doping scandal that came to light in Spain a few weeks ago. These racers must be kicking themselves in that their first legitimate chance to win the Tour since Armstrong first burst onto the scene is now gone without ever putting a single foot to pedal.

MLB

“Baseball is a simple game. You throw the ball. You catch the ball. You hit the ball.” I think the entire National League needs to have a shower talk with the coach of the Durham Bulls because collectively, they’re getting humiliated by the American League. The fact that Pedro got shelled in Boston, the Dodgers got swept by an average Twins team, and the Pirates needed a few seeing-eye-singles to finally snap a 14 game losing streak says it all. The good news for Angel fans, currently the bottom feeders in the AL West, is that another installment of their Freeway Series with the Dodgers begins this weekend, possibly enabling the Halos to get things rolling, finally.

Is it just me or is it absolutely brutal to watch a Giants game anymore? This team has absolutely nobody in the line-up to assist Barry Bonds. The fact that pitchers keep treating Bonds as if he were the home run hitting machine of old is incredible. Yet, Bonds is literally the only hitter in their entire lineup that can hurt you so why wouldn’t you continue to walk him in scoring, or game tying situations. With Moises Alou back on the DL, it would take Bonds another ten years to hit the 36 home runs needed to tie Hank Aaron’s record.

Will Eric Gagne prove to be the next casualty in the War on Steroids? Seriously, ever since the Palmeiro bust, Gagne has pretty much been a bust. Somehow, someway, the Dodgers need to drug induce another team’s GM and dump him in a player swap because something tells me Gagne will never be the same now that he’s not using

The Weekend Ahead

This weekend should provide for some exciting inter-league baseball match ups. For many, baseball doesn’t start until July 4th, or even after the All-Star Game, and both dates are right around the corner. Hopefully, I’ll get the opportunity to swallow a 12-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon and catch some games this Sunday for a change.

For you soccer hooligans France and Brazil, and England and Portugal square off this Saturday. If either of those matches is as dramatic as today’s Germany/Argentina penalty kick thriller, then we’ll all be in for a treat.

If you’re really bored, Thomas “Hit Man” Hearns fights this Saturday.

Enjoy the warm weekend and all the sporting events that make the days ahead so great. See you next week!